Harley Quinn stands inside the 24*7 with her cork gun aimed at the manager's head. Shelves have been overturned and products are stomped and shoved everywhere. Harley's hand is shaking as she glares at the man. "I TOLD YOU, I NEED A CAKE!! I gotta make it up to da fishy!!" The man violently shakes his head, "WE DON'T SELL CAKE HERE!!!"
Harley screams in a fit of rage, "YES YOU DO!! THIS IS A CONVIENCE STORE, RIGHT BUDDY? CONVENIENCE ME!!!" Good thing Dante isn't the first on the scene, eh folks?
It's certainly not a good thing that Dante isn't the first one to heed the call for aid at the convenience store.
He might have known what to do.
The thing about Twisted is that you can probably live here for hundreds of years and never grow used to it. In fact, it would be quite a fair assessment to say that there's no such thing as a regular day in Twisted. Every day is different and rife with very different challenges and dangers.
And by far the biggest challenge of these dangers is recognizing them as dangers!
Case in point; enter Kotal Kahn, the TASK force member who just happened to be the closest patrolman to respond to the 24*7's distress signal.
Sure, while Huitzilopotchli, the freaking God of War would be for all intender purposes more than a challenge to a common store robber, even if that robber happens to be the fabled Harley Quinn, the problem here is that as a relative newcomer to this Twisted realm, there's just no way Kotal can recognize the scene for what it is.
The doors are bashed open and Kotal enters in his full Aztec gear, ready to unleash righteous havoc on whoever dares defile the city that he has come to known as his!!
But.. as he enters.. he just can't figure out what he's looking at!
Golden eyes blink and sort of glaze over as he sees a girl dressed in full clown costume holding a rinky dinky cork gun at the clerk's head, all while demanding /not money/ but cake. For all Kotal knows this could be a custom of Twisted that he doesn't know about.
"Is this a joke?"
Famous last words Kotal...
From the sound of the doorbell, Harley turns her head to the door, letting the gun follow until she's got the gun pointed at Kotal. "WHA'? You sounded the alarm?!?!" She only her head this time and bellows out, "WHAT KIND OF FRIEND ARE YOU?!?" One can clearly hear "I'm not your friend!!" as he ducks out of sight. Those famous last words find their way into her ears at this point and the clown shakes her head. "Oh, yeah. This is TOTES a joke, bub." She fires the weapon, "AN' HERE'S THE PUNCHLINE!!!" The cork comes flying at him with the speed of a fired canon ball, of course it's on a string and is yanked back after a second revealing..... a.. canon ball? Obviously it won't kill Kotal, but it'll do it's fair share of stinging if it hits him. Harley's too caught up in the moment to consider anything else.
Well, if anything, at least Kotal's less that dramatic entrance gave the clerk enough chance to escape Harley's clutches.
As the store worker makes a run for it and calls out the true relationship between him and the clown girl, or lack thereof. Huitzilopotchli seems to understand what is actually happening now and narrows his golden eyes at Harleen when she, in turn, addresses him and points her gun at the War God.
"I am not your bub, friend."
Aztecs...they learn really fast."
Part of that learning process is never to underestimate your opponent, particularly when you know you are in a place where quite literally everything is possible.
Although Kotal would have been more than capable to survive that blast full on, he opts to take the safe route and to employ his sorcery just in case this trickster has something under her sleeves. "Skin of stone. To me." He chants and makes a raising motion with his hand, summoning a totem from the ground that begins to pulse with blue energy.
This energy wraps around Kotal's body and he holds still when the cork is fired at him. Only when the legit canon ball is shot does he make a move and he swiftly catches it on his hand, making a fist to crush it into dust.
Then he's advancing towards Harleen with purpose on his eyes. This guy isn't joking around at all, that's for sure.
There is an audible sound that escapes Harley's mouth as she witnesses someone pulling a combination Flash/Bane. It's a sound that comes highly appropriate to the sudden widening of her eyes. That sound is "EEEP!" Cartwheeling backwards (always away, never around) she snatches up her purse off the floor and then smacks dead on into the wall beside the BrainFreezy machine. Her brain races, oO(Seconds left, Harle! What to do!!) Suddenly it occurs to her, "I'M TOO PRETTY TO DIE!!!" ...and she drops onto her back on the ground. We never said it was a GOOD plan.
An appropriate response all things considered.
With purpose still seen on his burning golden eyes, Kotal advances towards the cartwheeling woman who begins to backs away from him. The Aztec's monster of a serrated sword is drawn and it might be very possible that Kotal fully intends to hack Harleen to pieces with his macuahuitl. After all, Dante never -actually- explained what being a TASK member entailed other than keeping the peace. Serenity sort of alluded that there's arresting involved but Kotal is fairly certain she was just kidding around with him! People don't really do that anymore, right?
Looking like he's about to execute some Outworld justice on the girl. Kotal raises his macuahuitl over his head when he corners the girl and... raises an eyebrow when she flops and falls on her back.
"Hmm?" He arches an eyebrow, adjusting his eagle helmet a little to get a better view of the girl in supine position. Is that some kind of defensive technique? Is she surrendering?
Kotal decides to poke her with the top flat side of his macuahuitl to see if she does anything.
Who knows? Maybe the best way to get rid of an Aztec God is to play dead.
Harley stares up at Kotal in confusion. Albeit a totally different form of confusion, but confusion none the less. She expected to be grabbed, or stomped, maybe get lucky and watch this giant bash into the wall. The poking is even more confusing. "HEY!! Would'ja cut that out!?!" Probably not the right thing to say. In an even stupider move she brings both feet up between Kotal's legs (assuming he's literally standing over her), kicks, and tries to make a mad dash for the door. If she gets away from it, she'll pick up a can of soup and load it into her pop-gun can and all. If she doesn't... well, this is probably going to hurt really badly isn't it?
Kotal wasn't standing literally over Harley, are you kidding!?
He's fought the likes of Cassie Cage before! He knows how vulnerable he would be in that position. The Cauchic was standing off to the side of her body, which at least gives him enough room to react when he sees the kicks thrown at him.
"Hmrg!" There's a grunt from the giant as he raises his left leg and defends himself from the double stomp to his groin by taking it on the shin instead. A million times less painful than a double kick to the jewels, and you can trust him on that.
"Ah, so you are awake." Mutters the giant when he sees that it was naught but a fake faint to throw him off his game. Seeing that Kotal isn't reeling from the attack as Harley would have hoped, the turquoise skinned man has plenty of time to adjust when the clown robber tries to get up and run away from him.
You know what's the nice thing about macuahuitls? Despite being tremendously sharp, they can also be used as paddles thanks to their shape! How else did you think the Aztecs captured their victims alive for sacrifice?
Just as Harley is reaching for a can of soup to reload her gun, there's a sound of something large flying through the air as Kotal tries to smash Harley's face with the flat side of his macuahuitl.
Just be glad he didn't take her offer of 'cut it out' I guess.
There's a click and a whurr and Harley smiles, "HEY BIRD-BRAIN!" Well, it sounded a lot like that at least. There's two paths from this point, let's take them apart one at a time shall we? Path one, Harley makes one more roll towards the door - aiming carefully, and firing the soup in Kotal's face. "I HOPE YOU'RE HUNGRY!!!" She cackles manically as she darts outside, leaving Kotal Kahn dealing with his Chunky Soup.
Path two, however, is reality. "HEY BIR-UGGGGGH!!!" Like being hit by a baseball bat in the arms of the Hulk, Harley goes spiraling through the air into the drink cooler sending shards of glass and beverages everywhere. Somehow, despite not being cut more than a tear or two on her costume, sodas spray into the air like an elaborate water display. It takes a full minute before she'll come to enough to try anything else. How quick will it take Kotal to react?
That... is a pretty accurate description.
Change baseball bat to cricket bat and we'd be golden.
But description aside, the ultimate result of getting smacked on the face by Kotal's macuahuitl is much like being turned into a tennis ball. However, Kotal does wince, not because he felt sorry for the girl that he just sent flying, but because he didn't judge the trajectory and smashed her into a bunch of the store's machines. Hopefully they won't charge him for that, woops.
As the water and soda sprays up in the air like a fountain, Huitzilopotchli approaches the fallen girl with that very same deliberate step to his gait. It's very perplexing how he moves, since Kotal doesn't seem to so much as walk, but kind of glides on the ground as if he were skating. Not that Harley would appreciate any of that being momentarily unconscious and all.
A minute is more than enough time for Kotal to approach Harely's fallen figure. A hand grabs her ankle with a strong grip to pull her out of the wreckage where she can be seen in full display on the store's now wrecked floor. The Aztec pats the back pockets of his belt and grimaces when he realizes TASK hasn't provided him with any handcuffs yet. Dante wasn't kidding when he said they were on a tight budget.. Oh well.. Fatality it is!
Maybe.. unless his opponent were to yield willingly. Even here, Kotal still feels bound to the laws of Mortal Kombat.
He steps on the girl's stomach and waits for Harley to open her eyes, serrated sword still held menacingly on his hand.
"Will you not surrender?"
It's not being held up by her ankle that wakes her up. Batman's done that to her enough times. There've been nights she's considered dangling like that on purpose just to sleep better. The drop to the wrecked and saturated ground? THAT wakes her up. But of course, before she can react Kotal Kahn's massive foot comes down on her stomach forcing her to flail dramatically - well, maybe not 'forcing' but she does it anyways. "SURRENDER?! I just wanted ta buy a caaa-aaa-aaake!!" She kicks her feet and tries in vain to push the foot away. "Is threatening people with guns a crime in this planet!?" There's a brief pause as her words sink back into her skull. "Oh.... ye-ha-haa.... I guess it is." It takes her a moment longer to consider her situation where upon she finally makes the observation that should have been obvious from the start, "WAIT A MINUTE! Since when did Twisted City have police an' hidden alarms?!?" She starts kicking again, "I WANT A LAWYER! AND A BURGER! I WANT A LAWYER WITH A BURGER!!"
It's hard to tell thanks to Kotal's ever glowing eyes and his Eagle helmet, but judging by the flicker on those orbs that make up his eyes, its safe to assume that he's rolling at the woman's reaction. He supposes that he could expect nothing less from someone who dresses like a clown, and one that lives in Twisted for that matter.
Kotal allows Harely to flail around for a moment longer whilst making futile efforts to push the foot holding her down away. The Aztec does love it when his enemies realize the folly of their actions by just thinking for a moment about what they are saying, it makes his job a lot more easier.
It's when Harley Quinn puts into question the veracity of TASK that Kotal finally reacts.
He /SMASHES/ the top of his macuahuitl right next to the girl's ear, oh so close to actually smashing her head in, a very real possibility since he send spider web like cracks on 27/7's floor. The guy looked like he was just tapping his weapon on it too, he could probably split the entire store in half if he really needed to.
"Allow me to update your information in the current state of our city, girl."
"There is now law here in the city of Twisted. No longer will we tolerate insolent behavior from miscreants such as the likes of you."
"Now, whenever your kind would dare to try and bring harm to this city or the people that live within it, you will have to deal with TASK! And heed my words well, child. Not all of us in TASK are as forgiving as I am."
Pointing down with an accusing finger to Harley's face, Kotal finishes his speech by saying, "Now.. repent for your actions--"
Who the hell is this boy scout?
"And I may yet let you live."
Oookay, maybe he's not such a good boy scout after all.
Her yelling only reaches a louder pitch before the weapon is smacked down beside her, forcing her to feel the tiles cracking beneath her back. Yep. She's quiet now! Not even an 'eeep' except for the one in her head. She listens to his update and tilts her head trying to figure out what 'task' is. Is this man named Task? Twisted has police now? That makes her smile devilishly.
Harley says, "L-l-l-look. I-I'm really R-REALLY sorry. I-i-it was an accident, I swear! A momentary lapse of reason! I'll be good! I won't do this again! I'll even go get my... um... my... my Parole officer! Yeah! Good ol' Mistah J will have me back in shape in no time!" She almost can't contain herself at the idea of Twisted having a peace keeping force, didn't her puddin' say he left because he was bored? "I promise! I swear!! Please don't kill me, Mr Task! We just got off on tha wrong foot!" She taps her fingers. "Hee-hee-hee... Foot."
Kotal narrows his eyes and dead pans at Harley's /PITIFUL/ attempt at a pun.
But then again, all puns are pretty pitiful so that's kind of redundant.
He does look convinced though, and she did say she was sorry, which in Kotal's book is just as well as surrendering.
"I am known as Kotal Kahn." The Aztec finally introduces himself when Harley begins to address him and Task man -- although she's welcome to call him that for all that Kotal actually cares. He steps off Harley and places his macuahuitl on his back again.
"You may go." Oh well, that was easy- "After you clean up all this mess." Says Kotal as he tosses her a mop and a bucket.
Of course there would be a cash for not being reprimanded after trying to rob the 27/7. But in reality, Harley is probably way lucky that she ran into Kotal instead of someone like Nny, something tells the Aztec that the psychopath wouldn't have been as reasonable.
To be fair she wasn't trying to rob the place, she genuinely wanted to /buy/ a cake - but she can take a hint. She catches the mop but the bucket crashes into her making her leap up and tumble comically. "I-um. Yeah! Yeah, sure sure. I'll do a good job or my name isn't..."
There is a brief moment where time stops and two chibi Harley Quinns pop out for some Q&A. "Don't tell him who you are, girl! He doesn't know any better!!" This one is dressed like Harley.
"Oh, no. No no no. You take credit for your deeds. You want to reform someday, right?" This one is simply Harley without the costume and wearing a lab coat. "This could spare your life one day!"
Shaking them both away and bringing herself back into reality Harley continues speaking as if the fantasy was still going on, "Both of you! SHUDDAP! I'll take credit for a job well done and eventually I'll be just as big as Puddin'." She realizes what she's just said out loud and blushes brightly enough that it shows through her makeup. "I-I'm sorry. Harley Quinn." She offers her hand to shake - not that Kotal is likely to take her offer.
"You are touched, are you not?"
Even if he does adapt fairly quickly, Kotal Kahn is at heart still a true and diehard Aztec. Not only does he still use very archaic language, he adheres by their traditions.
In this case, he's implying that Harley Quinn is crazy -which she may in fact be- and even in Aztec society it was frowned upon to strike those that were clearly not playing with a full deck of cards.
He shakes his head and obliges Harley-- or at least it looks like he's going to shake her hand, because he instead continues to patronize her and pets her head instead. Then he pushes on her forehead with an index finger.
"Well met, now get back to work, and think of what you've done."
Just as well, Harley probably had one of those hand buzzers on her hand didn't she?
Harley smiles happily as Kotal asks if she's touched, "In the head!!" Wait, is she proud of that? It hardly matters once he pokes her in the head and sends her on her way. "Y-yes sir." True to her word, well most of it anyways, she starts cleaning. Wondering just why she has Joker's voice in her head yelling about kicking cows?