|Cupcakes and feels|
The little elf wandered through the TASK habitation deeply intent on the clip board in her hands. Today she is dressed with adorable librarian efficiency. Her hair is bound up tightly in a bun and she is wearing that snug little button down white blouse tucked into a very lady like red plaid skirt that comes primly to her knees. She pauses in the dining room on the way to the kitchen to scratch a few little notes on the paper before her. The sweet scent of baked goods tickles her nose and she pauses a moment blinking and pushes her glasses up her nose. Was that cupcakes?? Following her nose the elf wanders into the kitchen and pauses in the door way.
Silencia finishes washing the last of the dishes, drying her hands and picking up a dishtowel. Right at that moment, Minu walks in, catching Silencia's attention. She smiles and waves at the little elf. "Hey there! Were you drawn by the smell of cupcakes?" Silencia giggles lightly before putting away the bowl she had been drying. "You will have to wait just a little more though, they aren't ready yet!" Silencia's appearance is, in contrast to Minu, rather messy. Her hair is tied up in a messy bun and she is wearing an apron that was too big on her, probably stolen from Kotal.
Minu blinks those big golden eyes as she looks at the sight before her. Yes indeed, the apron is to big on Sil because its the kiss the cook apron Kotal always wears when he does his big group meals. It simply gives the little elf a very pointed reminder of Sil's place in TASK now. "Um..yes..the cupcakes...they smell really good. If your not careful you will end up with Ferra and Torr in here devouring them before anyone else gets a chance." The little elf smiles with a touch of shyness. She likes Sil, the fae lady has been nothing but nice to her , helping her shop, being friendly. Its not her fault the elf is conflicted by her own feelings. Its no ones fault after all, not like there was ever anything more then work and what she would guess is polite male/female camaraderie between the elf and the war god.
Silencia waves her hand dismissively and grins. "I can always make more!" Silencia finishes up the dishes and puts them away, finally able to turn and give Minu her full attention, right on time to see that shy little smile. Oh how adorable the little elf was! It takes all of Silencia's willpower not to run over and cuddle with Minu. Silencia takes off the apron and sets it aside, gesturing for Minu to come closer. "If you aren't busy, would you like to keep me company, Minu? It won't be long until the cupcakes are done.." Silencia smiles playfully, trying to tempt the elf to stay with cupcakes. Silencia was not dense like her chosen partner, she was aware that Minu held some conflict in her heart. She had heard about Minu possibly having feelings for Kotal, so the fae could guess what the problem was. She wanted to befriend Minu, but she couldn't help but feel a bit guilty about what happened.
The little elf stands there looking outwardly as she always does, all business and efficiency and yet there is something in those golden eyes that speaks of being torn, half wanting to stay and share company and half of wanting to bolt like a startled deer in the woods. "I, um...no I am not too busy. Just working on this weeks schedule for Rayne, well, the spread sheet so she knows who has done what recently, who should be on time off and who needs to have a little extra work to remind them not to slack off when things are easy. Just the usual. The pups are off training with Kotal so, I really do have some time I guess." as she steps further into the kitchen and sits her clip board on the small table before tucking her pencil behind one pointed ear.
Silencia smiles happily as Minu steps into the kitchen. "Wonderful! You'll be the first to taste the cupcakes then!" Silencia walks over to the little elf and grasps her hands, guiding her to sit with her near the oven holding the cupcakes. Silencia's expression and outward appearance was cheerful and bright as usual, but on the inside she was worrying about how to go about this. She peeks around the kitchen, luckily it was abandoned. Most of the officers were working around this time of day, so they had the kitchen to themselves. Silencia's violet eyes meet the Minu's golden ones and the fae smiles warmly. "There's something I've been meaning to talk to you about, Minu." Before she can continue, Silencia quickly peeks into the oven, checking on her cupcakes. When she returns, she pauses before grasping Minu's hand again and bowing her head. "I'm sorry. I really am." Silencia stays like that for a moment longer before bringing her gaze back to Minu, a weak smile on her face. "I'm the reason you've been less cheerful, aren't I?"
Minu lets herself be lead over closer to the oven and sits in the offered chair. She really can't help but feel a little shy around the lady, her out ward direct engagement both physical and emotional is new to the elf really. She has always been bookish and more into her studies and research then direct contact with others. Her many years in the Grand Archive only made it more so because there were few enough others she actively saw on a regular basis and most of them were others like herself, bookish beings with little interest in socializing. Twisted had taken some getting used to but she had made herself useful, her native organizational skills being needed gave her access to people and she could hide away in work if it got to much to handle. The little elf sat quiet while Sil checked the cupcakes then blanched nearly white at the lady's next words. "I...I don't know what you mean Silencia. You have been very kind, very helpful and pleasant." Her heart skips a beat and her pulse quickens, afraid she knows what this is about and fairly certain she should have bolted when she had the chance.
Silencia smiles knowingly, though there is not cheer in her smile. "You know what I mean." Silencia looks a bit worried about the little elf. Minu looked so panicked that Silencia wanted to hug her and tell her that she was joking, but this needed to be done. Silencia holds Minu's gaze as she speaks, her expression turning into a neutral one. "Don't try to explain your feelings away. Because they wont leave. Come on, Minu. Be angry at me." The sober expression fades away as she smiles once more. "I really do want to be friends with you, Minu, but if things stay the way they are, I don't think that will happen. Be honest, Minu."
Minu turns positively grey at Sil's words and she blinks and leans back "Really...I don't want to be angry with you. There isn't anything to be angry about. You didn't do anything to me. I don't know what feelings you think I have that should mean anything thing here." She squirms and her small hand shakes and she contemplates just shifting and poofing to owl and flying right on out of the room. But then Sil would still be here and she wouldn't be able to avoid the lady forever.
Silencia sighs and giggles helplessly. "I'm not as dense as Kotal is, sweety..." Before she was unsure about the rumors about Minu and her feelings for Kotal, but Minu's reaction was enough to confirm them. Silencia's voice softens, the sound almost a whisper. "Why did you never tell him?" Silencia would not back down, no matter how much she wanted to comfort the little elf with sweet lies, she needed to be strong. Minu had been part of the reason why Silencia had been able to gather the courage to confess to Kotal and she felt like she owed it to the elf to help her through this. Even though Minu was doing everything she could to deny everything.
Minu looks like she is gona be sick. Big golden eyes blink hard and she swallows. A few breaths are taken and she scrunches up her pert little nose and frowns hard. A guttural noise is torn from her throat and the little elf all but throws herself sideways out of the chair and onto her feet with an exasperated "By The Scribe!" The small elf starts to pace the far side of the kitchen, she can't hold still and she can't sensibly run away. "It makes no difference. What I may or may not feel doesn't mean anything. There is no basis for it, no reason other then some chemical reaction in the brain or..something. Kotal is a god, a war god. He is not an ordinary man and it is quite clear he holds me in no more affection then anyone else who works for him, otherwise you would not be in the place you are. He isn't exactly shy and if he wanted me in that way I am sure he would have made such clear. What has been is purely professional, he has never done more then be kind and polite as a leader would be, perhaps a little extra because we worked so close together when things were challenging. However he never gave cause for any sensible being to believe there would be more forth coming." She wrings her small hands and all but stomps as she paces and spills her thoughts. "it would be beyond churlish of me to hold anything at all against you." Oh yeah, all that is brainiac for "I dig him, he doesn't dig me, and now he has you."
Finally the little elf is being truthful! Silencia smiles relievedly before quickly reverting to a more sober expression. She quietly listens to Minu's rant. Only after she's done does the girl stand up and walk over to the elf, her steps slow and deliberate. "Then what is holding you back?" She stops as she's standing infront of Minu, facing her. "Why do you keep torturing yourself if a simple confession could liberate you?" It takes a moment for Silencia to meet Minu's eyes again, her expression a mixture of various emotions. "All that you summed up, I had thought the very same. He never gave me a reason to think he might like me as well. I shoved my feelings onto him and was lucky enough for him to accept me. Even now, I train until I'm falling apart just so I can be useful to him, because I feel afraid of being left behind. I understand your thoughts and feelings, because I've been there myself." Silencia sighs softly. "I want you to get angry at me because that will help you move on. I had heard that you had feelings for him before I told him of mine. It was part of the reason why I decided to tell him. I was afraid..." Silencia smiles softly and even gives Minu a little wink. "Nothing is childish in the matters of the heart. No one is around but you and me and I wont tell anyone. Let it all out."
The little elf goes quite still, almost panting though as she breaths quick and shallow. She shakes her head softly "I don't want to be mad. I want to be sensible. I want to not feel like I am going to vomit every time the team teases him about you in front of me and he gets that look on his face that says they are right. Me saying anything at all to anyone will make things worse. I work here, I have a place here. I am not strong and I can't fight but I can do what I do here, I can help by keeping his affairs organized and his work life tidy so he can be what he is and not have to try and be.ordinary. If I corner him and say to him I feel things, it will make working together impossible because he will get strange and uncomfortable around me. I think I would rather face Mr. Blacks stupid attempts at training for weapons then to have Kotal pity the poor little bookish elf. Besides. I have always got the feeling that Kotal was not the sort to spread himself around that way. Other wise there is a goddess also chasing him he could have." Her words are soft and resigned "We can be friends Silencia because you are a kind person and a good person. He cares for you and that is not a bad thing. Your goodness will help him, maybe balance him." One small hand reaches up to remove those gold rimmed glasses and she uses the others to rub her nose "By The Scribe, why must all this be so uncomfortable. Books are so much easier to manage then people."
Silencia smiles warmly at the elf and finally gives in to her urge to comfort. She gently tugs Minu closer and wraps her arms around the elf. "If you want to be able to move on, then do not fight against your feelings. Be sad when you're sad, be angry when you're angry. You are a sweet and hardworking person and I want to help you. Please allow me to. It is impossible to keep your feelings nice and tidy, sometimes you simply need to experience them. Feelings aren't like books, you can't just put them away." Silencia releases Minu and grins. "You can say everything you want to me. No one will get hurt or pitied, but you will still be able to say the things you want to say." That grin turns into a smirk as Silencia teases the elf lightly. "And don't think you can fool me by saying everythings alright, I am very perceptive about these things!"