Pre-Game - So, you want to play my game, do ya? Hmph! Well, I'm flattered, I truly am! *Chuckles* But I digress. Welcome! Welcome to your nightmare! I am GATEKEEPER! I will be your Gatekeeper for this evening. All the other Gatekeepers have the night off, so I'm filling in, but they will be back tomorrow, so don't get any stupid ideas! I know how you idiots think! Hmm. I see you've all been marked with a number and stained with a color! I will be referring to you by those traits that you hold so dear. When I call you by your number or your color, you must answer, "Yes'm!" I feel like punishing one of you right now, but I don't want to feel like a killjoy, so I'm just going to punish two of you! *Chuckles* Whoever has the lowest number and the highest number, answer me, now! Time's up. If you did not answer "Yes'm" in time, you will receive a key! *Laughs* Take that, you overachievers! Now get ready to enter your worst nightmare.
0:31 - Uhh...I think I forgot a few things...All of you randomly choose the Chosen One, and figure who's the oldest and who's the youngest, OK? Surprise me! It can't all be the same person! Just straighten it all out before I come back, alright? *Snaps Finger* Go!
1:40 - Stop! Got all that figured out now? Good, OK, good. Chosen One! Hmph! Your friends have just thrown you under the bus! Hoo, hoo! It is a doozy! Black Hole for you, buddy! *Chuckles* In you go! You just sit there, OK?
3:00 - Stop! Whose turn is it next? Answer me! Time's up. If you answered "Yes'm" in time, you get three Time Cards! Hmph! You thought I was going to let you out, Chosen One? *Chuckles* Wrongo!
5:20 - Ohh, all right! Get out of that Black Hole. You just look so pathetic in there, with your puppy dog eyes! Ooh! Hm!
6:42 - Stop! You know, I kinda like those Time Cards...I think everybody's going to get three of them! Heh. I am having fun tonight! Yeah!
7:58 - Stop! Who's turn is it next? Answer me! I am thinking of a number between one and ten. What is it? Well? Time's up! Was the number the same number as the person setting next to you on the right side? If so, then you receive a key! If not, lose a turn!
10:20 - Stop! This is for everyone on a gravestone marked with an "X". You all get a Fate Card. Hm! Use it in poor health...
12:19 - Stop! Old One! You're going to play a game, now; just you and me, understood? Good! I'm glad that your brain hasn't completely shut down yet. You will roll the die five times, and you must not get a digit from your age...and if you do, huh, well I guess you have to start over. The game will not continue until you achieve this task.
14:31 - Uh...I release you from...the, uh...Black Hole?
16:26 - Stop! Everybody take a turn to roll the die. You will be rewarded or punished severely from what you roll.
The following text appears on-screen to give the result of a player's roll:
1 - Black Hole
2 - Receive a Key
3 - Do a Little Dance
4 - Get Down Tonight
5 - Receive a Time Card
6 - Receive a Fate Card
19:22 - Stop! Whose turn is it next? Answer me! Lose a turn. Just 'cause!
22:46 - Stop! Chosen One! Send someone to the Black Hole! Good, that's better! Now we are going to play a game, just you and me! Pick a number between one and six! Now roll the die. Was that the number you chose? If it was, get in the Black Hole and our game is over. If not, then pick another number and roll the die again! Was that the number you chose? If not, you'll receive a key! But if it was, the maggot you sent to the Black Hole gets freedom and a key!
25:46 - STOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOP! Whew! Whoa! You guys are going way too fast! Let's have you all go back five spaces, alright? But you don't get anything for it!
27:49 - I release you from the Black Hole.
31:30 - Stop! Where's the Young One? Where? Where!? Answer me! Oh, there you are! I missed you there, with you being so young and small...and weak. WEAAAAK! I want you to flip a coin. Now! I call Heads! Did you win? If you did, you get to take the next key that the Old One gets! But if you lost, well, the Chosen One gets your next key!
35:15 - *Wearing a ridiculous hat* Stop! *Pause* Who laughed? WHO LAUGHED!? Anybody who laughed will lose a turn for that! Jerks!
37:40 - Stop! None of you may continue until you've rolled your color! *Long Pause* Shut up! Shut up! Shut up! Shut up! Shut up! Shut up! Shut up! Shut up! Shut up! Shut up! Shut up! Shut up! Shut up! Shut up...
38:29 - Okay, um, I'm sorry, I...I don't know where I was going with that one. Carry on, maggots!
40:04 - Everyone from the Black Hole is released, with a Time Card for their trouble!
42:14 - Yowza! Whose turn is it next? Alright, come on, come on! Who is it? Alright...Give me your wallet! Come on, come on! I want you to take out your wallet, and give it to me! Just put it in the box that the game came in, then close the lid. Come on! Come on, I don't have all night! Come on! Come on! Alright? Good! Alright, let's just see what we've got here... *reaches down, pulls out the player's wallet, and opens it* Huh, OK, alright...Ooh, ooh! *searches the wallet* Oh, what am I gonna buy with this!? There's nothin...oh, whatever! Well... *pulls out clipboard and pen and starts writing* ...I guess I'll just have to write down this credit card number for future reference here, but... *Sighs* ...Whatever. *Pulls out Driver's License* Aww, look at this ID Card! This picture doesn't do you any justice! I mean, you are much uglier in person! *Puts license back in wallet* Oh well, whatever. You can get your wallet back! *Throws down wallet* If you had more than five bucks in that wallet, you get a key.
44:49 - I release you from the BlackHole-o-tron!
46:57 - Stab! Alright, whose turn is it next? It's your lucky day! Everybody, except you, is taken to the Black Hole! You just keep taking your turn until I get back, OK?
47:52 - Stop! Man, I bet everybody's really angry at you now, Kid! *Chuckles* Playing this whole game by your own lonely, stupid self! Pfft! Game's over, buddy...for you! Now that everyone else is released from the Black Hole, they get to decide your punishment! Either you can lose all your keys, lose all your cards, or you get to take a trip to the Black Hole! Decide amongst yourselves!
50:00 - I release you from the Black Hole...in time to play a little game. You feel like Havoc? I feel like some Havoc! Let's play some Havoc! Everybody take a Fate and Time Card. Things get a little tricky from here on out!
50:38 - Stop! Chosen One, steal a key from the Old One. That maggot wasn't going to use it, anyway!
51:09 - Stop! Old One, steal a key from the Young One! Tough cookies, Kid!
51:39 - Stop! Whoever's turn it is next, gets three turns in a row!
52:31 - Stop! Take two keys!
53:07 - Red light! *Pause* Green light!
53:55 - Stop! You, hold onto that die! Everybody, make up numbers til I get back!
54:36 - Stop! Whoever holds the die loses two turns! Keep rollin', Mama! Woohoo! Yeah!
55:53 - Stop! Get all your keys! Go! Go! Go! Go! Go! Go! Go! Go!
56:38 - *Appears with a skull face, saying nothing*
The following text appears on-screen:
If you are the first to notice this, receive a key.
56:58 - BLACK HOLE...EVERYBODY!
57:37 - Stop! Get out! Get going! Roll! Roll! Roll! Roll! Roll! Roll! Roll! Roll! Roll! Roll! Roll!
58:24 - Stop! Why do you keep...You have to roll it exactly! Or else you have to go back and forth, OK? Come on! You gotta get the number exactly to land on the last space! Come on! Jeez!
59:20 - Stop! You...get all...your...keys...and...GO!
60:00 - Time's up! Or, you just...watched this whole thing through for fun. I can't really tell. Either way, you are one soul poorer, and I am one beard richer! And to think, it all took an hour! Cause I am just that good, and you are just that pathetic! You stupid, stupid nerds! Hmph! Well, I'm just gonna go take your souls now, and then I'm gonna go shave this thing off...For Nightmare, this is Gatekeeper, telling you to go spoil your dinner!
Win Sequence - WHAT!? Ah, man! You just won, didn't you? Ah, well...Well, fine! Be that way! I guess I have to come to terms with that one! Alright, alright...Congratulations for winning, you're the best, I suck, you rock, I smell. Alright...For Nightmare, this is Gatekeeper, telling you...to go have fun and drink a soda. *Long pause* Jerk!